Seven Months

It's hard to believe that we've been home seven months.  It's amazing how much she has changed in such a short period of time.  We had our final home study update on Friday and our social worker couldn't get over what a dramatic change there's been not just since December but since the last visit in March.  So here's a list of things about my baby girl that she's either doing or I love about her.

1.  She's a climber.  Yesterday she spent the better part of a half an hour trying to climb up on the couch.  If she had another inch and a half on her or could have arranged the pillows just right on the floor underneath her she could have made it.  Let's just say I'm glad she didn't.  She also tried to climb onto a little ottoman I have and she was nearly successful. 

2.  She loves to say Mama.  Over and over and over.   While it can get a little monotonous when she's repeated it for an hour straight in the car (no exaggeration), I just love to hear it and the cute little way she says it.

3.  She will now come over to where I am sitting and try to tickle me.  She holds up her hands and wiggles her fingers and says ticka ticka ticka.  Most of the time she doesn't even make contact with my skin but she thinks it's hilarious and quite frankly, it is.

4.  She shushes me.  Last week we were at a restaurant and she was being really loud.  I tried the quiet voice, inside voice, yada yada yada.  Finally I looked at her and put my finger over my lips and said Gracie, Shhhhh.  She looked at me and said Mama. Shhhh and repeated the action and copied the low voice.  She has shushed me several times since then.  Usually when I say something she doesn't like such as don't put that in your mouth.

5.  She adores music of every kind.  Seriously, if she hears a commercial she is dancing to it.  And she does this little shoulder and head move that reminds me of Janet Jackson from her control video.  If I sing a song we have to sing it over and over and over. So much so that I would like to shuffle the itsy bitsy spider off to buffalo.  And she sings along too. 

6.  She has a temper.  Everyone tells me how mellow she is and for the most part that's true but take something away from her and girlfriend can throw a fit.  The throw your head back, stiff body, screaming to the heavens fit.  Yeah, me no likie.  We're working on it but she is so strong spirited and stubborn that it's a real challenge. 

7.  She loves to take all the pictures off the shelves in the living room and she has conversations with the people in the pictures.  Last night she had a lively conversation with a picture of my mother who passed away 8 years ago.  She must have been catching her up on all that's been happening.  She also likes to chew on the picture frames.  I keep telling her it's rude to eat your relatives but she still tries anyway. 

8.  We have so much fun together.  Yesterday we spent most of the day inside enjoying the air conditioning and playing and yet we had so much fun.  We built towers and played with baby dolls and puzzles and she sat on my lap and we had tickle games and peek-a-boo and it was so much fun,

9.  If it's open, we should close it.  If it's closed we should open it.  The second I open the dishwasher, she is behind me trying to close it.  If the drawer is closed, we need to open.  That keeps us very busy.

10.  She is obsessed with the toilet.  Twice I have forgotten to shut the bathroom door fast enough and both times I have found her with her arms splashing in the toilet.  And I'm not talking about leaving her unattended.  I'm talking about walking from her room to the living room which is perhaps a 10 second walk and thinking she is crawling right behind me.  Then I turn around to find she made a pit stop to go swimming in the toilet.  And both times we were about to head out the door.  Gotta love those last minute unplanned for baths. 

This was Grace in November 2009 at Horizon House in Ethiopia, shortly before I arrived.  She was on a feeding tube because she wasn't eating enough.

This is Grace as of early June.  What a difference a couple of months can make.

Leaving My Punkin for a Bit

So tomorrow I need to put on my big girl mommy pants and get on a plane and leave my baby girl for two days.  I have to go to a conference and while I will only be gone less than 72 hours, I am FREAKING out!  Everything is in place. My sister and brother-in-law will be watching her and I know she'll be totally fine and have a great time.  I know it will be an adventure to sleep over at Auntie Kate's.  But I won't be the one tucking her in and singing her to sleep or getting her up in the morning and ready for the day.  I'm not worried about her.  I'm worried about me but I will get through it.  It's a short trip so that's a blessing.  It's a conference I'm excited to be attending, and I will be able to eat my dinner without cutting up someones else's food.  But man, how I will miss my Gracie.  My lovely sister was kind enough to read my two pages of instructions on everything from how to handle her hair and skin care to what arm she prefers to held in for her night time bottle.  Kate could take care of her with her eyes closed but it makes me feel better to write it all down.  Tonight I was telling Grace that Mommy was going away on a work trip and would be gone three sleeps.  I told her who would get her up and who would put her to sleep etc.  I said is that OK and she grinned and said Yup.  Now, she probably had no idea what I said but it made me laugh.  We'll be fine.  Honestly, it will probably be good for both of us. So, wish me luck!

I Love Days Like Today

Today was such a good day. The kind of day where you just wonder how you got so lucky to have such good people in your life. It started off with a trip to NH to visit my dear friend Cyn, who was my roommate my senior year in college. On paper we have nothing in common. She was neat, I was a slob. She loved Jim Morrison, I loved Bryan Adams and show tunes. She majored in business, I majored in music. We should have been a case of two people who lived together for a year and never saw each other again. I'm so glad we don't live our lives by paper and that even though we seem like the odd couple, we make great friends. We have that kind of friendship that you don't have to work at. It's just always there whenever you need it. We could not see each other for months but it never feels that way. We're comfortable with each other, we appreciate and accept each other for who we are and we're proud of the families we've created, me with Grace and Cyn with her husband Mark and dog Sammy. Cyn loves her dog Sammy and prefers that her parenting be limited to the canine persuasion. But she loves my kid. She has loved Grace since before we knew who she was. She's a big part of the support system that got me through the wait. When I finally got my referral the first gift I got in the mail was from Cyn and it was a Plymouth State onesie. During the wait to travel I would receive a random e-mail from her checking in to see if I'd heard any updates or needed anything. She raved over whatever recent pictures I had received and rejoiced with me at my baby shower and when I finally got the go ahead to travel. She came to the airport to greet us when Grace came home but had to leave before we got in because our plane was over four hours late and the weather in NH was getting bad and she needed to make sure she could get home in one piece. When we get together she marvels over Grace's newest accomplishments and sits on the floor and plays with her. She loves her and she doesn't need to tell me that because she wears it all over herself. Today we were having lunch and I said something to Grace and she broke into this big smile and she just gave me that, my mommy is so awesome look(I cherish that because I know the looks in the years to come will not have that same compliment). Cyn said, "Did you just see that look she gave you?" and I said yes. And then my old stoic friend Cyn teared up and said "I'm just so, so happy for you that this has happened to you and to see her look at you with such love makes me so happy." How lucky are Grace and I to have someone in our life that feels like us being a family brings happiness to her.

After we left Cyn we went to the birthday party of a little boy named Asefa. Asefa's parents and I were in the same travel group and he and Grace were at Horizon House at the same time though she was with the infants and he was with the bigger kids. I haven't really written that much about our actual stay in Ethiopia but when I look back to that week I always think about how lucky we were to travel with such fantastic families. It's such an overwhelming experience to be in another country and meeting your child for the first time and I can't imagine what the experience would have been like without such amazing people to share it with. They get the wait, the fear of being rejected by this child you've wanted for so long, the anxiety and excitement of traveling to their birth place and meeting with their birth families. It's hard to explain what that's like unless you've lived it. Asefa's parents were part of that experience and quite frankly, had it not been for them,and the other families in the group, I don't know how I would have survived the plane ride home since my sister and I were both so sick. All of the families we traveled with were fantastic but Asefa's parents were particularly wonderful to me. I remember crying because I was so sick but was so worried about Grace and Asefa's mom just sat next to me and held mine and my sisters hands and said, "We've got you and we've got her. We have plenty of hands on this plane so you rest and you don't worry". Talk about a godsend.

We also got to see Tomas, another little boy whose family we traveled with. Tomas' family will always hold a special place in my heart because we went on our birth family visit with them and one other family. It was probably the most emotional day I have ever experienced. Totally rewarding but exhausting in every possible way. After the meeting we made our way back down two hours of THE bumpiest road I have ever in my life been on to Awassa where we stayed the night at a hotel. The three of our families had dinner together and shared our experiences and stories which is something I will never forget.

Both boys are doing unbelievably well and it was so great to see them and their families and reminisce and get caught up on how everyone is doing. We took lots of pictures(which I'm not posting because I didn't think to ask their parents permission)of the three kids together. Neither boy knew Grace that well as they are older and were in a different house but they enjoyed seeing her and she them. Everyone kept remarking on how amazing the difference in Grace was. Tomas' family got to Ethiopia a few days before the rest of the group and they had gone into the baby house and saw Grace. Tomas' mom told me that she couldn't believe that Grace was the same baby that she held who was limp as a rag doll and is now this crawling, babbling, dancing little girl. All the kids have come so far and I'm in awe of how resilient they all are. Especially the older boys who had the language barrier to overcome as well as having been with their birth families so much longer than Grace was. And here we are six months later sharing birthday cake and raving about our amazing children and being so thankful for having them and each other.

It's hard to believe that this time last year I was anxious and irritable about hearing any news about who my punkin was. I couldn't imagine that in a years time I would be home six months with my amazing daughter and sitting at her Ethiopian friends birthday party. I love days like today.

New Look and Picture Post

So I figured since I've had this blog for a couple of years that it was finally time to spruce it up a bit. Let me know what you think of the new look.

My camera (thanks to my brother-in-law Kevin) finally let me download my pictures so this will be a mostly pictures post.

I can stand all by myself!




I love my TUTU!

Look Mommy, I'm swinging!





I'm so funny!

My First time in the pool

I like swimming!!!

Gracie and her cousin Sarah

Gracie and her cousins Nate and Sarah at Disneyland

Gracie and Nate

Auntie Amy, Uncle Kevin and Gracie waiting to get on It's a small world.

Mommy, why is this crazy thing moving?

Take that Uncle Kevin!

Auntie Amy and Gracie


Gracie and her Kids at the happiest place on earth.

It's My Birthday

Today I turned 39 years old. I woke up this morning thinking about how different my life is from last year. Last year I had a fine birthday, but I was anxious and nervous and on pins and needles waiting to hear something, anything, about my baby. And while I knew it wasn't likely I would get a referral that day, I did end it being disappointed. Fast forward to today when I woke up content. Sure, my life isn't perfect but having Grace has filled so many holes in my life. Last year I spent the evening wishing for my baby. Tonight I spent my evening at a Mexican Restaurant where my baby was moving and grooving to a Mariachi Band. Last I ended my birthday sad and anxious. Tonight I ended it feeding a bottle and singing to this beautiful girl. Oh what a difference a year can make.

Six Months Together!

Today marks our six month anniversary of being a family. In some ways the time has flown by and in other ways it's hard to remember what it was like before Grace entered my life. Every day I spend with her just reminds me of how lucky I am that the universe aligned just right so that baby girl was matched with me. We just fit together so well.

So here's what we have been up to. Two weekends ago we had a visit from Auntie Andrea and Uncle Rob. Andrea and Rob are two of my closest friends and they are a wonderful aunt and uncle to Grace. They live in Ohio but visit a couple of times a year. We were able to have a nice visit when they were on the Boston leg of their trip. The picture below is not from the visit. It's from when they were here for Gracie's birthday. I love this picture.


Last weekend we went to California and spent a fantastic four days with my sister Amy and her family. I was a little nervous about traveling since it was my first time traveling alone with Grace. I really had nothing to worry about. Grace is a trooper and a really good traveler. Because I was worried about getting through security with a baby I decided that I should get to the airport two hours early so we arrived at the airport at 6:30a.m. for a 8:40 flight. We were checked in, through security, had coffee and pastries from Starbucks and were sitting at the gate at 7:15. Yeah, that totally could have back fired on me. I was afraid that her good disposition would be wasted sitting at the gate and then she'd be a pill on the plane but she was fantastic. Even the couple seated next to us remarked at how well behaved she was. I was especially surprised at how nice and helpful everyone was to us. I forgot that when you fly into Long beach you have to get off the plane and walk onto the tarmac. Not very good planning for a person who had a baby, a diaper bag and a rolling suitcase to get down the stairs. Luckily, there was a lovely couple seated behind me who carried my bags down for me. It's nice to know that there are still so many kind people circling in the world. Our trip was so fun! Gracie adjusted very, very quickly to her aunt and uncle and cousins Nate and Sarah. The only member she did not take well to was their dog Bingo. Bingo is a love but he's huge and he's under the impression that he is a lap dog. When he saw Gracie all he wanted was to love on her but he just scared her to pieces. By the end of the visit she was intrigued by him but still terrified. He's such a gentle dog, he wouldn't hurt a fly. I'm sure Gracie will catch onto that soon. We got there on Thursday in enough time to see my sisters kindergarten class put on Stone Soup. Adorable! Then Amy had a bunch of friends over to meet Grace and she did not disappoint! She was up until 9:30 pacific time and had been up since 5:30a.m. eastern time and didn't melt down. That child can really handle a lot.

On Friday we went to Disneyland and it was so much fun. The one ride that she hated was the Carousel. I was sure that would be the best one to start her off with but alas, it scared her to pieces. She was belted on, I was holding on tight and she had a death grip on the pole. When the horse started moving up and down she gave me this crazed look that just said "are you kidding me? This thing moves?!?!?!" She hated the carousel but liked the tea cups. Go figure. She had such a good day and Nate and Sarah were so phenomenal with her. They were so protective and loving and fun with her and she ate it up. The rest of the weekend we hung out and Grace had her first swim in the Williams' pool and she loved it! She did great on the flight home too, sleeping almost the entire flight.

About a month after we got home from Ethiopia Grace and I participated in an attachment study for internationally adopted children. We were asked to participate in it by our international pediatrician at Tufts. We did two visits with Grace and I where they tracked her heart rate and saliva levels and they did a couple of exercises to see how she reacts to things. They also videotaped them and I filled out a ton of questionnaires to go with it. Last Tuesday I went and met with two of the students who did the study to get some feedback on our results and they were really, really positive. They said that it's quite clear that we have a super strong bond in just the short time we have been a family. They said I have a great demeanor with her and that she calms very easily yet feels like she is able to explore providing she knows I'm still in the room. They said they had seen so much improvement in her from the first to the second visit and that she is becoming more animated and vocal and comfortable. I know that. I have felt that for months, but I have to say that it's really nice to hear from an unbiased third party.

Grace and I had our usual Saturday of running errands but today she was especially fun. We went out to dinner and she was dancing in her high chair to the music cracking up everyone around us. We played this game while waiting for our food where I put one hand on the table, she puts one hand on mine, I put my other hand on top of hers and then we start moving our hands really quickly. We played that game last week with Nate when we were in California and she remembered it and it was cracking her up. She has such a contagious giggle. Tonight when I was giving her the bed time bottle, I was singing to her as I usually do. I started singing baby mine from dumbo and her face exploded into the biggest smile I have ever seen and she touched her head. In the song there is a line that says from your head down to your toes. When I sing that line I touch her head and then her toes. She always enjoys that part but never as much as she did tonight. It was like she was telling me that was her favorite song to sing and I just loved how she knew it was the part in the song to touch her head. I started crying because her reaction was so joyful. She looked on the outside how I feel on the inside. Then she snuggled into me and sighed. The kind of sigh you have when you are content and all is right with the world. I'm so proud of the little family we have become. She is the very, very best thing that has ever happened to me.

I'm sorry I don't have pictures to post of our California visit but I still can't get the pictures off my camera. I'll try to work on that this week.

So life in our household is great these days. Grace is pulling herself up on every piece of furniture she can reach and is feeling quite proud of it. She hasn't tried walking while holding onto said furniture but I know that's coming soon. She's getting to that stage where she's interacting more with people and it's really fun. When we used to play she would play next to me but now she's starting to play with me which is quite fun. She's also learned a couple of signs for more, thank you, please and all done. Every time we sing the Itsy Bitsy Spider she can sign more and tell me she wants to sing it again. Yeah, that's not still fun after the 85Th time in a row. She is pointing to everything and saying Wuz Dat(what's that)? When she points to a picture of her I say who is that and she points to herself. Yes, I already know she's brilliant but I'm sure you're also thinking that as well. When she babbles it's in a conversational tone. There are breaks and she waits for you to respond before she continues. She's so much fun and she continues to have a really good disposition but her stubborn streak has certainly come out.

Her eating is continuing to improve. No recent doctor visits so I'm not sure how much she weighs but she is eating a variety of foods, including guacamole that she ate by the spoonful. I couldn't get it into her fast enough. If anyone has some suggestions on how I can keep her from touching her hair while she eats that would be appreciated. I only shampoo her hair once a week because the shampoo dries it out but there are some things that can't just be rinsed out, like maple syrup. I tried putting a hat on but she takes it off. I tried a shower cap that I tied in the back with an elastic but she got that off too. I'm now considering a bathing cap. And no, I'm not joking, but if you have other suggestions I will gladly entertain them.

Next weekend we're going to California to visit my sister Amy and her family. We're going Thursday through Monday and I am really looking forward to it. I'm a little nervous about how Grace will do on the flight. She did fine on the 17 hour flight from Addis to Boston but she was also shell shocked and not very mobile. I'm hoping for the best. It should be a fun weekend and she'll make her first trip to Disneyland. My nephew Nate was disappointed that she was too young to ride on splash mountain.

I'll try to post some updated pictures soon. I've been having trouble uploading pictures from my camera.