I'm not sure why, but I actually thought that once I was on the "official" wait list, I would be very calm about the whole process. I figured that once all the paperwork was out of my hands, I would feel like the wait was out of my hands and I would be very calm during this time. Right? Wrong!! I'm far more anxious now that I'm on the wait list. Every time I see an update from my agency about a new travel group being announced or a family announcing their referral I get seriously excited and anxious, as if I should expect my referral any moment now. It's hard to remember that I have months to wait. While I never claimed to be the most patient person, I really never thought I would be this impatient. On the other hand, I've never waited for my child before. I can't stop thinking about what he/she will look like, what their little voice will sound like, how often they laugh.
I can't wait to get the room together but since I don't know the gender and the age could be anywhere from 0-24 months, I'm holding off on decorating but I do need to clean the room out. Right now it's a spare bedroom/office so I need to figure out where the stuff is going to go. And I seriously need to clean out the closet. I'm not even sure what's in there right now but since I haven't touched most of the stuff since I moved in last September, I'm guessing I don't really need it. Maybe getting that cleaned out will make me feel better.
I guess in the meantime, I just need to continue to enjoy the children already in my life as I wait for my punkin to come.
