When I started the adoption process there were a lot of things I worried about. One in particular was that the baby wouldn't have a father. Actually, I have to say that it wasn't so much the father part since I have so many great males in my family who I know will be great male influences. I guess my real concern was that they would only end up with one side of the family. I always enjoyed having my mom's side and my dad's side. Though we were always closer to my mom's side, my dad's side had a lot more aunts and uncles and cousins and though I didn't see them that often, I liked knowing there were so many of them.
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately and I realize that the punkin will have two sides. The mommy's family side and the mommy's family of friends side.
The mommy's family side consists of my dad and step mom, my sisters Amy and Kate and their husbands Kevin and Dennis and their amazing children Nate, Sarah, Meghan and Jake. It also includes my Aunt Wendy and Uncle Hank who are like a second set of parents, my cousin Ann and her husband Jon and Ella and Caleb, my cousin Jenny and Ethan and my cousin Eric. Not to mention all my cousins, (especially my cousin Erin whose always seems to send me a friendly e-mail just when I think the waiting is about to make me crack. Her timing is always impeccable), aunts, uncles and family friends on both sides. I know that I have an incredible support team and I know how lucky I am but a child can never have enough people that love them.
For those who know me well, you realize that I don't make friends that easily. I have lots of acquaintances and people I enjoy but I have a very small group of true blue friends that I cherish. They are the people that read this blog religiously(even though hardly anyone uses the comments section!), are calling or e-mailing to check in on me and how the process is going and are waiting for the day I call or e-mail with the good news of who my punkin is and when I'll bring her or him home. These are the people that will be the "other side" of the family. They include, but are not limited to, Karen and Jimmy who I've mentioned before, and their four kids. Ellen and Jon and their three kids. Ellen and is my friend that I met in the seventh grade and we've been there for each other ever since. And even though they're in Florida now, the separation hasn't made a difference. There's Andrea and Rob and their dog Austin who live in Ohio. Andrea and I met over 7 years ago when we both worked at Lesley University. I think it took about a half a week for us to become buddies and we've been super close ever since. She and Rob are gentle souls and I feel so grateful to have them in my life. Then there's Cyn, the Big Meanie, my roommate my senior year of college. On paper there probably aren't two people who had less in common than she and I did but we just clicked. We have that kind of friendship where you don't need to talk often or give the friendship a lot of maintenance. We have the kind of friendship that you can come back to and every time it's like you never left. And her and her husband Mark and their dog Sammy Davison Jr live nearby in New Hampshire. Let's not forget Brenda and Bill in Delaware, even though he is an orioles fan. Brenda was one of my college room mates and one of the first friends I met in college. And of course I can't forget Amy and Jim and Olivia in Kansas. Amy, Brenda and I were college roommates and they are responsible for some of my fondest memories. I doubt the punkin would have gotten that many people out of a dad's side of the family! I feel grateful for the people in my life and the laughter, fun and friendship that we have shared. And I'm so glad that that they'll be the aunts, uncles and cousins that make up the second side of the family. Now if you'd all move closer I'd be a really happy girl.
If I didn't mention you it isn't because you're not important, it's just that I have to save some of you for other posts.
I guess the point of this post is to remind me that there are things in life that work themselves out and family is one of them. Some people have family, some people have a family of friends. I'm lucky enough to have both.
