I think her onesie sums it up beautifully. She was so, so, so worth the wait. On Thursday we hit two anniversaries. The 3 month anniversary of our coming home and Gracie turning 11 months. She's come so far in so many ways. She is now crawling. Only backwards and only a couple of crawls before she figures out that scooting is still the faster mode of transportation at this point. She's so much more mobile now and you can see her scanning the room thinking hey, if I want to get that thing over there on the floor, what's the fastest way to do that. It's like every day she learns something new. She has one tooth that came in and a couple more about to make an appearance. She says "mama" and variations of "Uh-Oh" and "yeah". She's really quite amazing. She is eating much better than she was and I can really tell that she's growing and getting so much stronger.
She has been babbling for weeks and had been saying mamamamamamamamamamama but I wasn't really sure that she identified me as mama and really knew who that was. Then about a month ago, she woke up at 4:30 in the morning which is really a rare occurrence for her. I went into her room because it was clearly a you need to come get me now cry. I was thinking, oh, I really hope you go back to sleep as I changed her diaper and then she looked at me, put her hand on my chest and said mama. And I thought, hey, you can get me up every morning at 4:30 if you're going to say that to me. It was positively thrilling to hear your daughter say that for the first time. It was the first time I really understood the meaning of the expression my heart is about to burst.
She seems to be handling our new schedule well and the weekends are getting easier for her. She still likes to have lots of sitting on mommy time but I do not have to spend every waking second holding her so that's been nice for both of us.
Yesterday was my niece Meghan's birthday party and it was nice for Gracie to see everyone. I forget how serious she can be when she's around a group of people she doesn't see a lot. She's usually pretty relaxed and vocal with me and my immediate family but I forget that so much is still so new to her. Once she loosens up she is really animated but it does take a bit.
We have an important event coming up. This coming weekend Grace will be baptized. It will be a fairly small affair but exciting none the less. She will be baptized in a dress I bought in Ethiopia. It's really important to me that we continue to celebrate her Ethiopian heritage. It's especially important given that one of the things her family expressed to me during our birth family visit was their hope that God would be an important part of her life. I look forward to sending pictures to her family.
I've actually been thinking a lot about her family. I sent her family pictures and an update of how she's been doing. It's the first update I've sent since being home. I haven't talked alot on this blog about her family, and I'll never give a lot of detail as I feel strongly that it's Grace's story to tell and decide who to share it with. For now, I'm just the keeper of the story. But meeting them was such an important part of the puzzle. I got to see the area where she was born and to get a small glimpse of what her life would have been like. I'm not saying her life would have been unhappy or unfulfilling, but it would have been hard. Being in Ethiopia gave me such a different perspective on what is important in life and what is truly necessary. Meeting her family was the most difficult thing I have ever had to do but it was also so rewarding to be able to look them in the eye and tell them that she would be loved, and adored and cared for and to thank for allowing me to have the great honor of becoming her mother. And yet, with all the gratitude I have, I also have great sadness for what they are missing. That sly little smile, the way she rolls her eyes to the side when she's not quite sure about something, the cute little voice she uses to talk to her baby dolls or the belly laugh she lets out when her cousins dance and sing for her. As full as my heart it, it hurts for them.
So, in a month I will be the mother of a one year old. I'm so proud of how far she has come but I will really miss this snugly baby stage. I love that she buries her head in my neck and pats my face when she's having a bottle. I love how she closes her eyes and giggles when I give her tons of kisses all at once. But I'm sure that new and exciting times are ahead of us.
