Back to Earth

Well, now that I have spent a wonderful weekend celebrating that I passed court and rejoicing in the news that Grace will soon be home with me, I think I'm slowly coming back to earth. There is so much to do and probably much of it will happen in a very short period of time. I'm hoping that we'll get travel news early this week. From the "unofficial" tally, there are at least 14 families that passed court. There are likely to be a few more that we're not aware of since not every family is part of the e-mail list. We also know that not all of the families will travel at once since there can only be a maximum of 10 families traveling at one time. That's because each agency only gets 10 embassy appointments per week. Some of the families that passed on Friday may not be ready for travel because their immigration paperwork may not have been received by the Ethiopian Government. I know that all of my paperwork has been received and I've had that information verified, but it still doesn't mean that I'll make it in the first wave. But honestly, just to know that I've passed is a huge relief.

There are at least 4 single parent families out of those who passed court last week. I didn't post this much during the process, but there were two scares during this process when I feared that Ethiopia would close to singles and my adoption might not happen. The first scare was when I was about 7 months into the wait and the second was just a couple of weeks after I got my referral. There has not been an official ruling so the fact that singles are passing court means that nothing has changed yet, but I wouldn't be surprised to see it happen at some time, thought I sincerely hope that it doesn't. I am eternally grateful for those of us who passed and I pray daily that they continue to keep the program open and that many more singles pass in the future.

So I spent the weekend making lists, panicking, re-reading the lists, panicking, organizing baby stuff, panicking and shopping for things we need and for donations for Horizon House. I think I got a good amount of things together to donate and I also have some new and gently worn children's clothes that I'll donate as well. It's overwhelming with all the things that need to happen in a short period of time and since as of today I don't know if I'll have days to prepare or a couple of weeks. It will get done either way, but did I mention I'm panicking a bit?

On Friday a friend of mine since childhood came to visit and she and her daughter gave me two of the most special gifts I have received.

The first was a white onesie that has the image posted below on it.

The second is a cream tote bag that has the following image on it.

So adorable and so thoughtful of them to get something so specific to Grace. Thanks Laura and Annesia! They got it from a website called cafepress.com. Just type in Ethiopia and you'll be shocked at the options you'll find!

So, now I go into prepare to depart at any minute mode. I have a lot to put in order both at work and at home but it will be worth the lack of sleep since I know in the end, it will bring me to my precious Gracie.

Oh Happy Day!!!!!!!

Today I got the news I have been waiting 17 months for. Today I passed court in Ethiopia. That means that in the eyes of the Ethiopian Government I am now legally Grace's mother. I expect to get travel dates early next week. I'm not sure how how much time I'll have to prepare but really, does it matter? My baby girl is coming home!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think I will sleep soundly tonight for the first time in months!

Seven Months Today

Grace is exactly 7 months today. At the end of last week I got an update on her. Some of it was fantastic, some of it a little scary.

First the scary: She isn't gaining weight at the rate they would like. She'll drink about an ounce and a half from the bottle and then lose interest. So as a proactive measure they are supplementing her bottle feedings with a feeding tube. I'm obviously grateful she's getting such care and attention and that's she in a place that can provide her with the nutrition she needs. However, it's very unsettling to get a call telling you that you're baby's on a feeding tube even if you know it's being done for good reasons. It makes a difficult wait unbearable. That being said, there does not seem to be any underlying medical issues and while it was only a very small gain, she did have a gain in weight this month. I'm hoping that we'll see a big improvement with the feeding supplement. I was also told that she doesn't like the feeding tube and will pull it out. To me, that's the most positive sign that she's still feisty!

Now the fantastic: A WH social worker was visiting a few weeks ago and sent me an update on not just the eating issues but how she is doing in general. She said she interacts and engages well with the other babies when she's on the floor with them. She kicks her legs a lot and vocalizes loudly, she blows raspberries and is very smiley and sociable. It's just so amazing to get these little snippets of what she's like. All the pictures I have of her are so posed and I constantly worry if she's doing the things that babies her age should do and now I know that she is. Quite a relief!

Still no travel news. I'm just desperate to hear anything at this point. This part of the wait has been exhausting and I'm definitely cracking. So if you could send some good vibes, prayers,whatever you like, into the universe for us to hear something soon I'd be very appreciative.

I've Still Got Nothin

So I wanted to update the blog since it's been a week but to be honest, I still have nothing to report. There still hasn't been word of anyone from my agency passing through court yet. No sense of when I will travel. Not even any measurement updates of Grace. I really have nothing and honestly, it's getting pretty draining. I feel like I'm in a holding pattern and can't plan anything for fear that I'll get the e-mail telling me to travel.

Last saturday I took Meghan and Jacob out with me to do errands. At first Meghan didn't want to come but then she changed her mind. When I asked her why she now wanted to come, she said "Auntie, I was thinking that it's getting hard to not have Gracie and I didn't want your errands to be sad and boring so I thought it would make you happy if I came with you." Even the five year old knows I'm on the verge of cracking. I'm hopeful that something will happen soon. Any little sign would be very welcome. Here's hoping that the next post is a little more up beat.

I Don't Want To Wait Anymore

Not that I have any say in this part of the process, but I really don't want to wait anymore. I just want to get on a plane and go get my daughter. I want to stop thinking about what it will be like to have her in my arms. I want to walk around the house with her in the new baby sling I got for my shower. I want to put her down in her very own crib in her very own room meant just for her. I want to go to Target with Grace instead of just going there for Grace. I know she's well cared for but I want her to be well cared for by me. I want to be the one kissing her forehead to see if she has a fever. I want to give her a bath and put her lotion on her. I want to cuddle on the couch in her room and read all of the books I've bought while I've been waiting for her. I want to begin being a real life mother to a real life baby. I love looking at her beautiful picture but I am ready for the real version. The version that poops and cries and smiles and giggles.

So in case the above paragraph hasn't clued you in, I haven't heard any news about travel and It's really starting to get hard. Excruciatingly hard. Yet all I can do it wait. Her room is ready, her clothes and towels and crib sheets are washed and put away. Her baby book is filled out as much as it can be. Heck, I even finished my shower thank you's in 5 days. I'm running out of busy work. And sanity. I just want my punkin to come.

Shower The People You Love With Love

Well, in my case the people showered me and what a shower it was!! Last Sunday my sisters and parents threw me the most amazing baby shower. I knew the place and date but I didn't know any of the details. When I got there I walked into a long hallway that had the place cards on it and a framed picture of Grace. At the end of that table was a small table with my very favorite picture of Grace and an album. My sisters had sent out little note cards with the invitations. The note cards had pumpkins stamped on them and each guest was asked to write a wish or a good thought for Grace and I. All the cards were put in an album. I have very thoughtful, creative sisters. Next we went into the main function room where all the guests were for the beautiful brunch that was planned. The theme of the shower was...........a punkin baby! The invitations were a little African baby popping out of a pumpkin. The cake replicated the invitation. The centerpieces were pumpkins with a little African baby in a diaper, with a pink bow on her head sitting on top. The pumpkin was on a pile of silk fall leaves surrounded with fall wrapped Hershey kisses. The favors were little pumpkin candles. And each table had a different framed picture of my punkin baby Grace. I'll tell you, my family can carry out a theme like nobodys business.

There were about 55 friends and family and it was really amazing the amount of love I felt in that room. It felt like everyone else was as excited to be there as I was. I was just overwhelmed by the love and good wishes blessed upon us. You can not believe the amount of gifts that Grace and I received. Other than diapers and formula, there is very little left that I need to buy. We got a travel system, high chair, her bedding set etc. She got some of the most adorable clothes I have ever seen and her Aunt Andrea got her these little socks that look like Mary Jane shoe's. This girl will be styling.

I was really blown away with some of the gorgeous gifts that people made for her. Our dear family friend Gail made her a quilt that is a map of the world. My friend Karen's mother made her a beautiful sweater. A few other friends made her blankets as did two of my aunts. One of the most special pieces was a quilt made by my Aunt Nancy. It's a brown and pink quilt that matches her room beautifully, but she also put her referral picture on fabric and then sewed it onto the quilt. I wish I could post a picture but since it has her picture on in it, I can't, but trust me, it's fantastic. Another amazing gift was a painting that my cousin Ann made. At first glance it looks like she painted a butterfly but as you look closer you see that it's actually the letters of her name that make the butterfly. Her Ethiopian name is the body of the butterfly and then Grace and Elizabeth make the wings. I know my description doesn't do it justice but it is absolutely adorable. She also painted flowers that are exactly the same type of flowers that are on the decals that I put on her wall. Ann is the craftiest person I have ever met and I can not imagine how much time this took her. These are the types of people I have in my life. The people that will take their time to make beautiful things for your baby. Now you can begin to understand why I rave about them. It was a perfect day in every way. My sisters Amy and Kate, my dad and my step mom spent over a year thinking about what the shower would be like and no detail was left to chance. I don't really have enough of a vocabulary to express how grateful I am. Not just for the beautiful shower but for the richness they bring to my life. Thanks again to all my friends and family for coming and celebrating with me. I'm so lucky to have you in our lives.

The weekend in general was just spectacular. My friends Andrea and Robin flew in Saturday from Ohio and we spent the day walking around Salem. Late that afternoon my friend Brenda and her husband Bill and their baby Thomas came in from Delaware and then my friend Lisa came from Vermont. My sister Amy flew in from California on Saturday night. After the shower on Sunday we all hung out with my family and some other friends and watched the Redsox and the Patriots lose. That was the only sad part of the whole weekend. I'm not over the Redsox yet but I do have to root for the angels because I only root for two teams... The Redsox and whoever beats the Yankees. On Sunday night we went through all of the gifts from the shower since it was such a blur when I was opening them. That was a lot of fun. On Monday I did some organizing, spent some time with my family and then had dinner with Andrea and Robin. It was such a great weekend. I can't remember the last time I had that much fun. Well, that's the wrap up but no fear, there will be a few pictures to follow. They are not of the actual shower as I don't have those pictures yet but they'll give you an idea of what it was like.

Most of the Gifts from the shower. I plan to show her this picture when she's 13 and says she never gets anything.

Centerpiece

Shower Favor

Bedding Courtesy of Grandma Judi and Baseball Honey(my parents)

Quilt by my Aunt Nancy. I can only show the part without Grace's picture

Quilt of the World made by Gail

Sweater made by my friend Karen's mom

The closet full of beautiful clothes

Guess Who is 6 Months Today?

Why my Gracie of course! I wonder how she's doing today and I keep hoping that this will be the last month that she'll be without me, though I know that's highly unlikely. It's amazing to think that I'm over here counting every second we're apart and my poor little baby has no idea that her little life as she knows it is about to be turned upside down. For the better, I know, but still, imagine what that must be like when you're so little and have no idea what's happening. I certainly hope that she feels all the love I'm sending her today and everyday and somehow senses that her mommy will be coming soon.

On a completely unrelated note, I have noticed that over 930 people have viewed my blog, yet almost no one ever posts. I certainly don't blame you because I too am a lurker and rarely post on other peoples blogs but it would be nice to know who you are. So leave a post some time if you feel like it. And if you don't well, I don't know who you are so I can't be mad at you.

So since there is not much else to report on I am going to just sit and count the hours until the Big Bang Theory is on. Actually, first let me post this public service message. Dear Public: Watch the Big Bang Theory!! Best Wishes, Beth. Seriously, you will not regret a second of it and you will laugh hysterically the entire time. I'm still chuckling over last week's episode. It's so good that I refuse to answer my phone when it's on. Trust me people, you'll be thanking me for turning you onto it.